So many things are going through my mind even when I take a sleeping pill, I am restless. My niece and her family are coming over from Idaho Falls, a 3-hour drive. She has six kids from 15 – 2; the last four are really little. She has so much love for us. She insisted on coming down because my husband is not doing very well. We love her…
The saddest part now is even when he gets up. I can feel his life force leaving. No sparkle 
to his eye, in fact, his eyes have been really hurting him and this morning, he didn’t want to take a shower – or he couldn’t because he was sleeping. When we turned him, he was in pain no matter what we did that is a sign of further deterioration.
His eye looks so sick and dull like I cannot see his spirit.
Ashley came over while I went to the store yesterday, and it was a beautiful day. As I was driving I couldn’t help but remember my sweet husband’s words.
I would say “It’s a beautiful day isn’t it”. He would answer “yes but not as beautiful as you”.
That will be seared in my mind and heart forever – and it makes me want to cry knowing that I will never hear that again…
