Personal Stories of Triumph, Pain and Everything In-between…

What I have learned

What my many years of life has taught me. Or maybe not!

I received a comment on one of my articles, so I popped over to Lux’s blog (About Life and Love). What I found was interesting articles, one in general really made me think. It was called 10 Random Life Lessons.

The life lessons were simple to the point and made me think.

Love Isn't EnoughOne life lesson that really stood out to me was love is not enough, and that is so true. Just
because you love someone doesn’t make them a good partner in life.

Who knows why we fall in love with people who hurt us – my first marriage was like that.

I, being loyal and believing in marriage worked so hard to try to build a home when I should have left many years before I did. I just really wanted to believe this man loved me as much as I loved him.  And boy did I love him – innocent wide-eyed love in a way I will never love again.

Instead of watching his actions – I believed his pretty words. When he would berate me or even hit me, he was always so sorry. When he cheated on me – of course he will never do it again if only I did xyz it wouldn’t happen. I couldn’t leave my kids needed a father – things would be good after a while then turn really ugly, and the cycle begins.

When he hit my daughter who was 13 I just could not stay – it was like god picked me up one day and placed us out of harms way. I believe it was the arms of God because I didn’t have a choice.

I left with nothing but my kids and the clothes on their back – literally. I didn’t want anything  that would cause him to be angry or retaliate.  Material things were of no importance.

After 16 years it was over and scarred my kids and I forever. That is the saddest part I was doing the opposite of what I should have been doing – my kids didn’t need this type of father. And to this day my son will not communicate with him.

That was 25 years ago – it was painful only because it was the end of my dream.

When I think back and try to analyze why I would put up with this – I believe it is because I had an absentee dad. I just wanted to be loved – and since I was a little girl, my goal in life was to have children and a family.

I was only 16 when we met, and I knew nothing about life; I was innocent – he was 24.

Need I say more…

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lonely womanI am sure you have all seen the programs where an older woman has been conned out of her life savings by a man. I use to think how could that happen to women who are smart enough to save for a financially secure life. How stupid can one woman be?

That judgment was very wrong, since I have been going through this life changing event with my husband, I can see how it could happen.

When your husband is slipping away it is so lonely. Some days I really feel vulnerable and would just like a soft place to fall. I can see if these women are feeling this lonely how they could fall into this trap.

Just to be able to get rid of the pain and feel alive and loved would lead someone to want to believe. These con men really know how to play on that – it makes me sick when I hear or see how these women’s lives have been destroyed.

This is a strange blog post I know. I just hope that women can see how valuable they are at every age and not ignore the warning signs of someone taking advantage of their goodness and vulnerability.

I will never again judge someone who has been hung out to dry by a man who is a low-life scum playing with her emotions…    #UltimateBlogChallenge

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Little Girl With Pink Flowers Asters In Their Hands

Thank You Mom

Life is funny sometimes; we don’t always know the impression we leave on people we have known in the past. I connected with a friend from 35 years ago on Facebook (Yes 35!).  It was her 32nd wedding anniversary, and I congratulated her with, and I was at your wedding!

Her comment back was “We have been friends for a long time. I cherish those early days of working together. You taught me a lot …””

I was deeply touched, what could have I possibly taught her? When I asked,  she said – You’ve had tremendous heartache, but you smile and move forward, as did your mom – great examples…

To be put in the same category as my mom is unbelievable – she also told me I was one that never put judgement on people and was accepting. My mom was exactly the same way…

No one ever knows what impression they are leaving on people they meet.  I am humbled – to be compared to my mom,  it is such an honor.

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